Glorification

There is a word that has been taking on a different meaning to me every single day. The only thing that I regret about it is why I did not learn it earlier. Glorification; it means so much more than just giving honour and praise as the English dictionary would put it. It is a word laden with so much meaning – if it were an animal it would be a chameleon.

I have glorified some things so much that they have taken their position on a pedestal in my life. They have gotten so much glory from me that they command me and I do their bidding. Yes, glorification is not just giving glory – it is giving control. You grow what you glorify, you are subdued by what you glorify and you are over taken by what you glorify.

The web woven by glorification is so intricate, beautiful and safe for the glorifier. It is all this till you want to live on the other side of it. On the inside of the web of glorification lies so much comfort, ease and security. Yes, it is easier to glorify than it is to vilify or be indifferent. Much easier to lurk in the shadows of constant glorification and not take responsibility for one’s life.
Like many of you, when I first thought about glorification I did not think it was a big deal. However, now that I am looking back to the point where I first thought about it I am realising that it is a really huge deal.

Before I glorify glorification itself let me show how I have glorified something as simple as fear. I have let it envelope me and it has gripped me so hard I cannot seem to shake it off. Fear used to be a shield, it protected me from sticks, stones and even words! Then one day I was wounded and fear became a crutch, I could not function without my heart beating furiously and my pulse demanding attention. That was fear; it had penetrated my being so much that I could hear it crying out as it coursed through my veins. It had taken over, it had subdued, and it had gotten comfortable.
Fear made me believe its thoughts, words and actions were mine. I never once did question their origin much! How do I question something coming from so deep inside me? Fear had grown roots in me; I was producing the fruit of fear and I was convinced that they were mine. I guess the growth was fuelled by failure and experience – things which should have made me stronger!

So many times I let go of opportunities when fear showed up and reminded me who the real boss of my life was. I delayed sending in proposals, reports, and even making phone calls because I was “afraid” of the results. I delayed going to the VID because I was “terrified” of failure and the possibility of having to pay for a license therefore wasting money. In my head fear conjured up so many excuses which I saw as reasons not to do so many things. Crazy enough I still fear getting out of bed on some days, simply because I am afraid of what the day has to offer.

What you glorify knits itself to you so well that getting rid of it means getting rid of some parts of your being. I am slowly learning that although fear has crippled me it is not me and I am not it. I am painfully carving away the bits and pieces of fear that have bonded themselves with every fibre of my being. It is painful because it involves doing the very things that I am afraid of. It means ensuring that parts of the perfectionist in me dies too, because she has brought me more pain than joy. She is one of those that have fed fear till it incapacitated me.
The bottom line is that you really have to be aware of how you handle life. Glorification might as well be a weapon of mass destruction, taking no prisoners as it strides around the world. Remember; you grow what you glorify, you are subdued by what you glorify and you are over taken by what you glorify.

The river flows. . .